My Advice to You for 2019 – When you feel lost & broken

My Advice to You for 2019 – When you feel lost & broken

If you asked me a few years back where I want to be in 2018 or even 2019.. Most likely, it would not be where I am today. In fact, I probably wouldn’t have been able to answer you. All I could say would be for my family to be happy and most likely, myself exploring the world.

Settling down was the last thing on my mind.

Whenever anyone told me that they’re ready to go home and get a place of their own.. it baffled me.

Skip forward to 2018, this is exactly what I was craving for.

This doesn’t mean that I grew up and realised what’s important. Although travel has been the best lesson I could have wished for. It means that as we discover ourselves, our priorities change and once we fulfil certain desires – new ones come up.

2017 was a year of madness. As much as I grew inside in the first six months, the second half of the year was next level. It became clear to me that before being able to make anyone else happy, or help my close ones – I need to build my own strength to not only use it but share it also.

2018 was when I realised that the previous two years have been a rollercoaster for a reason. I’ve learned that trusting myself and believing in what my gut is telling me, or more like begging me was the right thing to do. Even when I had absolutely no idea what will happen afterwards.

I needed to follow the feeling that felt right, but first I had to step away from everyone and everything to allow it to come through. It was the hardest thing I had to do but without it, I truly believe – I wouldn’t be where I am today.

After travelling around the world and experiencing some of the most incredible moments – all of a sudden I found myself craving ‘home’. Wishing for a space of my own, where my belongings can be organised, placed where they belong and I’d be able to find them without looking through backpacks or suitcases.

I started craving for a routine. A routine! Something that definitely was not my desire for till then. Dreaming of my own little space with a desk where I could sit down and work on whatever it is that I want to share with the world. I wanted a space that feels comfortable and safe.

But most importantly, I wanted a place that I can call home together with my partner who has been the most incredible gift for all those years. Thanks to who I’ve learned how to chill the f**k out and enjoy the moment. Thanks to who I’ve learned what true love is and what it feels like not wanting to travel for months without him. (Cheesy much.. excuse me!)

Those are the most incredible feelings. But it took years to be able to discover them. And a lot of hard work, heartbreak and strength to allow them to come through. Learning who I am has been the biggest lesson for the past few years.

Allowing myself to feel lost, alone with my feelings and also having the most incredible time with some of the most inspiring people I’ve met – allowed me to ‘Just Be’. To be who I am today and to keep discovering myself and my path.

So if someone told me, that in 2018 I will find myself living in a place that I call home.. I wouldn’t have believed them in a million years. A place that has everything we wished for and so much more. Woah.

I am still shocked how the Universe really has our back once we believe in it and in ourselves. I am so incredibly grateful for that voice deep down. For experiencing everything that I have experienced in the past few years.

And it’s thanks to learning and listening to my gut, that I could truly feel ready to settle a bit and know that it’s exactly what I want. That experience of exploring different places, living abroad and meeting people that shared their visions with me – showed me a different way of being. That it’s possible to be happy by being YOU, not by following what should be done. Everyone is on a different path and everyone is here to experience it differently.

Allowing myself to listen to that voice showed me, actually – it has proven me that things will fall into place if you believe in them. If you allow yourself to believe that it can be done and if you want it with all your heart – it will happen. I promise you.

But you have to listen. You need to find a way to hear it. For myself, it was getting away, allowing myself to be in a new place where I would experience all kinds of emotions and not only having the best time – but forcing myself to be alone, with my thoughts.

It was those scary times, the saddest and most emotional times that showed me how to listen. And by saying listen – I don’t necessarily mean you will literally hear it. I mean, you will learn how to know deep down what to do next, that ‘voice’ will reveal itself to you in one way or the other. And it won’t always be easy, but if you quieten your mind – it will come.

For myself, meditation was the huge leap. Listening to many talks, reading books on various topics, podcasts and listening to music that felt right. All of that has allowed me to broaden my perspective and have a little bit more understanding how it all works. Saying that, it’s way too much to wrap our heads around. But it allowed me to see things in a different way.

To sum it all up, what I’m trying to say is that when you feel lost, when you don’t know what to do and you’re so desperate to know what can be done – concentrate on finding that voice. When you’re hoping someone can give you the answer – trust me, the answer is in you but you just need to learn to hear it. It might feel impossible at first, I know – but it’s the first step to improvement.

Look for what works for you – it might be yoga, walking in nature or meditation, try it out. I’ve tried loads of things that didn’t work till I discovered a way of meditating that changed my approach. Before that, I found meditating to be super difficult – falling asleep and all that! But the best way will come to you! (Read: http://elitravelbug.comeasy-guided-meditation/  if that’s your struggle too)

When you start to follow that voice, you might feel unsure at first, you may have an impression that what you want now is the complete opposite of what you were aiming for. I certainly felt like my world was going mad, as I’ve learned to cover it up so well before and was looking outside for directions instead of inwards. What was a part of me, in a way felt foreign at first.

At the time I had no idea if what I was doing will ever make things better, I just followed the only way I felt was right. It was difficult and hard and the breakdowns it involved were sometimes unbearable. But once I understood the fact that every single thing we go through in life teaches us something – my perspective changed and those difficult times were turned into lessons.

All the past experiences led me to who I am and where I am today – happy, fulfilled and excited for what 2019 has to offer.

So If it’s one advice you take from me – let it be to:

Learn how to listen to your voice, listen to it, believe in it and understand that you need different things at different parts of your life journey.

One year you’ll need to travel, to understand who on earth you are, to see different ways of life, to discover places you’ve only dreamed of before. Then after that incredible journey, you may want a place you call home and the relationship you always knew deep down was right – might just come back better than it ever was.

Whatever it is that you’re wishing for, as far from reality as it seems – keep believing and imagining. Visualise what it will feel like when it becomes true. Because if you believe in it enough.. it will be your reality soon.
So, do not loose hope.

Here’s to 2019!

May it be filled with loads of love, self-growth, joy, abundance, gratitude, time in nature, time with the closest ones and courage to share, grow and inspire <3

Happy New Year 2019 to all of you beautiful souls out there!

Eli xxx

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